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Mom

When life weighs me down/
And my faith is drowned/
In an ocean of tears and Im greatly wound/
And my demons try to take me now/
You paint the clouds/
Of Heaven for me with the gracious sound/
Of your voice like a choir of Angel's/
Lightly replacing/
All the dread that Im quietly facing/
Crying and chasing/
Peace while denied of it daily/
A mild engraving/
In my heart of my wildest slavery/
But those bells, the fear is stifled when they ring/
I see your face, your smile it saves me/
And Im a child in safety/
And Im reminded of days we/
Wiled away these/
Hours with chatting idle and clang tea/
Glasses together and I basked in your warmth/
Grabbing at your/
Hand even while Im dashing at more/
To see the world, while ecstatic of course/
I callously formed/
A thick skin to renounce and ignore/
My past and its force/
But I cried at your absence and bore/
All the shame as I was smashed to the floor/
By my powerful wars/
Too down to endure/
But everytime I knock you answer the door/
Because to me youre purity/
Here for me/
Steering me/
In the right direction away from the tyranny/
Of beer and weed/
Peers and greed/
With your clearest dreams/
And sincere belief/
Youd say, "Dear, just breathe"/
"Here, lets read"/
And fear would leave/
And my ears would meet/
With soothing words/
And newly earned/
Mirrored peace/
Because you appear to me/
Near to me/
Whether home or a world away/
My hands would curl and pray/
And even if my problems were plural that day/
Id burn em straight/
When the smoking swirls would fade/
Id see the certain face/
Of my eternal grace/
And in a wordless haste/
Id remember my worth in spades/
Because you were the first to say/
Things turn out the way they were meant to be/
Especially/
Those times I was doubting destiny/
Questioning/
Things as negativity crept in me/
But you stood next to me/
And said to me/
You are my sunshine/
Now run right/
Into my arms and come lie/
Down at home, rub eyes/
Fatigued/
It's done, breathe/
Just love me/
And we'll see the sunrise/
Youre my lighthouse/
That lets me find ground/
When on this endless night out/
I just cry out/
And the fire wraps/
Around my tired clout/
And saves me from the tides wrath/
And as I climb out/
Of this sentence I see you at the finish line/
And the distance blinds/
To all but one resistant sight/
To live a life/
That doesnt see you stifle hidden cries/
Everytime Im forced to lift up like/
A vagabond/
And saddle on/
Because of orders I didnt try/
To take, but the thickest vines/
Couldnt break our heartstrings/
An army/
Couldnt bar me/
From coming back home and locking/
The door and never leaving again, just start tea/
On the stove, a light flashes and Im 8 again as alarms ring/
As dark streams/
Make way as morning light starts barging/
Through cracks in the blinds and I hear footsteps marching/
With the driven purpose of not startling/
A Queen pokes in her head and softly sings, "Darling"/
And her Prince wakes, smiles back and says Mommy/
And I wake up across an ocean/
Lost and flowing/
In my own life, not alone in/
My dreams, caught and frozen/
In a memory/
That says to me/
He knows how its all unfolding/
So walk in moments/
 With absolute faith theyll come true/
Words from an Angel, Happy Mother's Day Mom, I love you/


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I cant sleep/
Because these damn bleat-/
Ing fat sheep/
Harass me/
With thoughts of home everlasting/
They ask me/
If I'm doubting/
Whether I'll be happi-/
Er back there or out be-/
Ing the bad dream/
I've been to half the peop-/
Le I've known, just last week/
I slapped, beat/
Down three/
Annoying ass teens/
For laughing/
As I watched a movie slammed, beat/
After a savage week/
At work, I found these/
Hands swing-/
Ing grabbing/
Necks to gash and ring/
While attacking/
Panicking/
I stand, shriek/
And pass weak/
Guards, they cant catch me/
Tragedy/
Befalls actually/
Facts and brief/
Glass meet-/
Ings with a pastor week-/
Ly leaves me/
Seeking/
A deity/
To help free me/
But they keep me/
In this cage weeping/
Scheming/
To beat these/
Screws/
Loose/
Unleashing/
Rage when they leash me/
Up like a dog, deep things/
Run through my head underneath these/
Veins running varicose/
My demons seem/
To always be very close/
Air and smoke/
Are an errant joke/
The mirror p…

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I wake up, and then reach/
Across my bedsheets/
My arm feels heavy/
As it crashes empty/
My head thinks/
Something's wrong, I'm upset, blink-/
Ing back distressing/
Feelings pulling me to the end, sleep/
Then leaves/
And I'm wrestling/
With another morning without the best thing/
In my life, best friend, re-/
Newal of soul, with trembling/
Lonely lips/
I blow a kiss/
To the ghost that lives/
In my heart, set free/
From all but our happy ending/
Floating swift/
On a moaning wind/
Made of tears and clothed in missed/
Days in paradise, cozy, vict-/
Orian and pouring mixed/
Drinks as boats and ships/
Rode the drift-/
Ing currents, a potent sim-/
Ilarity to us/
It was rare of me to fuss/
Over one girl, I went from carrying the brunt/
Of the world on my shoulders, a pair of evil stumps/
To cherishing the love/
You gave me, the clarity and trust/
Was barely even a/
Concept, a fairy tale with dust/
That choked the air I breathed and sucked/
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